Hi Lovely, glad you stumbled on this cozy little blog of mine. This is a place where I plan to share the real and raw details of my life. The good, the bad, and everything in between. I want this to be a safe space where we are free to talk openly and honestly about anything and everything. But before we dive into the fun here is a quick disclaimer about my writing....
I speak in slang, have typos, and write how I hear it in my head. For anyone who is considered "the grammar police" this is the best place to make your exit for your sanity and my own lol! Proceed with caution and grace in the cozy space. So without further adieu, brew that cup of coffee, cuddle up on your couch, and I hope you enjoy this little piece of my story!
How It All Went Down
I am not going to lie... I would hear my pregnant friends talk about getting sick, feeling exhausted, nausea, backaches, and headaches constantly. I have to admit, I thought their stories were a bit over dramatized but never in a million years did I expect all of the above to happen to me! I suppose it serves me right LOL.
So here is how it all went down. We found out end of September, early October. I have read that some women have this crazy sixth sense when conception happens and I had just that. 2 days after the night where (cough, cough) the deed was done ;) I ended up getting severely sick. This very random and unfortunate event lead to throwing up over 5 times and anything I would ingest would fly back out in a matter of minutes. It was TERRIBLE. Of course we thought it was food poising or possibly the flu... but it only lasted 1 day. Like I said it was super random. I have read about this happening to others upon conception even though it is an extremely rare reaction.
So that's when my husband Lenny and I started to get suspicious. About 4 days later I was still feeling a bit off... so in my state of paranoia, I begged Lenny to grab me pregnancy tests from the corner drug store. He huffed and puffed, but graciously ended up getting me a test.
The Pregnancy Test
I waited until the next morning. I remember it was a Saturday and we were planning to go out to a family party. There was going to be drinking involved so I wanted to take the test to also make sure I was in the clear. So after taking a wee and waiting 3 minutes... a faint second line began to appear. I was SHOCKED. Surely this was an evaporation line or something. I was convinced it was an error. So, with my hands shaking, I ran to Lenny and shoved the pee stick in his face LOL. I told him this is crazy and there is no way it's positive! I was in disbelief. He calmly smiled at me and told me to wait another day to take the other one.
Wait another day!? Waiting a day at that point felt like waiting a year and a half! But I did and the next morning the line showed up even darker. With the reality of the situation sinking in, I started to become ecstatic. For the second test, I remember Lenny was taking a shower at the time and I ran to him and again shoved the test in his face, screaming "BABE LOOK, SEE, SEE THE SECOND LINE!!!" He again calmly smiled and me. This was the moment we both realized we were going to become parents!
It's crazy the exact moment that feeling sinks in...
You feel a rush of excitement and then shortly after you feel fear, anxiety, uncertainty, and a millions questions flood into your mind.
Fear, Anxiety & Uncertainty
Many of you don't know that I actually struggle with an autoimmune disease. Which made getting pregnant terrifying to me at first. I will take some time out another day and go in depth on my health status, but for now babe and I are all good in the hood! By the grace of God. That's the most amazing part about the fear and anxiety that can be crippling at times. Trusting that God is for me and has predestined this little babe inside of my belly makes every negative thought or feeling disappear. I pray daily that every cell is protected and that God would give me the wisdom and discernment to do what is right for my body and future baby through the upcoming months. If you guys share in this same faith, I would greatly appreciate all of your prayers surrounding this little growing miracle of ours.
Morning Sickness, Reflux, and Aches.
So let's address the struggles and hurdles from week 0-12. Everything started around week 6. The morning sickness started and to my shock it wasn't morning sickness at all. C'mon now it should be renamed to ALL DAY SICKNESS. I felt nausea all friggin day lol. There were very few things that actually helped me but I will list a few remedies below:
Zevia Ginger Ale (amazing taste and 0 sugars!)
Frozen Grapes. Yep. Anytime I would get that terrible feeling, I would suck on my organic frozen grapes and it helped at least take my mind off of the discomfort.
Back Rubs. YASSS. I asked my hubby almost every single night to give me a little back lovin and he definitely did not disappoint. I love him so much for helping to make me feel comfortable when I felt at my lowest.
That is honestly about it! I wish I had better remedies but this phase really took a toll on me. I found my self more often than not, just suffering and surviving. So from weeks 6-10 it was terrible. It peaked at 8 and started to get better from there.
Enter in Reflux... Yippie
Just when I think I am in the clear entering into my 2nd Trimester, I get another lovely pregnancy perk. Acid reflux. A.k.a. something is burning a hole in my chest after I eat. I am still finding ways to work around this problem. A few of the things that help are:
Ginger Tea or Chamomile.
A glass of milk after eating.
Walking around after eating and not laying down right away.
Back rubs... bc who the heck says NO to a back rub?!
Chewing my food a million times before swallowing.
It's the little things in life guys! I never thought I would have to experience these pesky symptoms and as sucky as they are at times... I can honestly say they are all so worth it.
I love when people tell me all the reasons and wives tales behind these sucky parts of pregnancy. For nausea I have heard that the sicker you feel, the smarter your baby will be because of the HCG coursing through your body. Makes feeling like your going to hurl a little bit easier I suppose! And for the reflux, I have heard that it means your baby will have a thick head of hair. As funny as these are, they truly do help to focus on the main goal... growing a perfect, beautiful, and healthy baby; regardless if they are true or not lol!
Onward and Upward!
So they say the 2nd trimester is easier than the 1st. I am definitely looking forward to a little break in hopes to actually enjoy a few months! I can already tell things are looking up just in the energy I have and how I have been feeling as a whole.
After my 12 week ultrasound, I have to tell you guys, I bawled like a little baby. Happy tears of course! This wasn't the typical tummy ultrasound but instead they did it "on the inside" if you know what I mean ;) I was able to see this little nugglet squiggling and squirming around for the first time. I saw hands, toes, and heard his/her perfect little heartbeat and just about LOST MY MIND. I am not even kidding you, bless my amazing OB because your girl was straight ugly crying spread open on the table LOL. I know... too far and terrible imagery, but I am just keeping it real. She laughed at my blubbering and we both stared in awe of the little moving miracle that you can see captured below.
"I want you to know that when we finally get to meet you, every single sucky thing I have felt was 100% worth it. You are so worth every second of pain or discomfort and I would go through it a million times over just to see you healthy, safe, and sound. Life being made... cell, by cell, is such a miraculous thing. That is why it moves me to tears. I cannot wait to kiss your sweet little face off. Love your Mumma."
"even the darkness is not dark to You, but the night shines like the day, for darkness is as light to You. For You formed my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are Your works, and I know this very well.…" Psalm 139:12-14
I will try my best to update you guys consistently throughout this process. I know when I first found out, I LOVED reading and hearing real authentic stories of what actually happens during pregnancy, so my goal is to be as honest and transparent as possible here. Until next time friends, you are so loved!